Is it Friendship or Fiend-ship??

I am often asked this question. It embarrasses me to no end and yet each time the answer remains same. It's not as if I have deliberately done something to maintain the status quo. May be I have been plain lazy. And if somebody is wondering what that question is. Let me come straight ( ??) to the point.

Have I made any friend ( read: Gay) in Delhi?

This question looks awfully simple but no matter how many times I answer this- whether to myself or some random guy I picked on chat rooms- the answer doesn't change. Yes, I have no friends in delhi. Leave aside question of his/her being straight or gay.

I have often tried to figure out the reason why I am alone in such a fun loving boisterous city. Am I that anti- social, boring, boorish, stupid or simply put what is wrong with me ? It's not that I have not come across people. I have my profile on a few networking sites where I do get responses; and last year I was a chat-oholic. I have met a few of them in real as well. Good people. Educated, articulate and some of them pretty hot too. But why those seemingly nice, intelligent guys have never bothered to remain friends with me. In fact, I have asked this question to a few people I have met that how many gay friends they have been able to make. And most of them surprised me by telling me that they do have a few very nice friends, some even have gay best friends. How I wish if I had even a single friend.

Let me first tell you why I want a friend. I live alone in this city. I hardly get to interact much at my workplace because of nature of work. Therefore, weekends are my worst nightmares. I have nothing else to do on weekend except reading. I love going out, intelligent conversation, exploring the city its monuments, eating at new places, shopping and works. But most of you realize that these activities are half as fun if done alone- or at least I find it boring after a time. I would love to have a friend for all these, not to mention my trips to gay pubs and discussing who looks hotter on the street.

I have found an answer to this question as well. Now, I am not one of those guys who blame others for everything and anything that happens to them. I feel most of the things in our life are in our locus of control- barring a few, of course. This discovery has not been without it's share of pathos. I have concluded that I do not have gay friends because I am an average looking guy. Ok, let me add something there. I am an average looking person with not so average intellect. Now, I know how facile this sounds, but trust me I have given due consideration. How else will you explain that people who are ready to sleep with me, who can have long conversation with me on phone for the entire day before meeting me, suddenly realize that they are far too busy with their life. In the first case, in all modesty let me say that- some very hot men have found me to be 'hot' and I don't blame them for objectifying me. hehe. In some case, we have done it and I have expressed my desire to be in touch with them, doing the things that I mentioned in the beginning. However,even the best of these guys perhaps follow the one meeting policy.

There is another category, where people go gaga over me. Only on phone that is. When we talk. they will coo sweet nothings and everything will be 'suggested' to be on offer. Hardly, there has been a case when the deal was cut.

Contrary to what my luck has been, I have found that every good looking guy- no matter how dubs he is- will have at least a few friends, that too equally hot, if not more. I fully know that how this gay world functions on whole concept of beauty and looks but what really perturbs is the shallow hypocrisy these people put up. Why do they have to embellish an 'Indecent Proposal' in the garb of friendship. Why can't we behave a little mature and start differentiating between friendship, love, sex and sex of casual nature.

Disclaimer: Whatever I have written here has also been given another name : Delhi Gay Dating. There are high chances that if you are not from Delhi, you would not have experienced this. Equally possible it is that you are a Delhite and goodlooking. So, I know that you are not part of the tribe.