Hindus & Muslims: Why we are more similar than different

I recently wrote a long rebuttal to a Pakistani journalist's article proclaiming Indian intellectuals can't accept Pakistan, only to later feel that I might have been a little jingoistic in my response. I absolutely agree that there are sections of Indians who feel that way, but to term an entire community, or so called liberal Indian intelligentsia, Anti-Muslim would be preposterous.

This has reminded me so many incidents from my life where I, as part of growing Indian middle class, faced people with varying degree of paranoia against muslims. Having grown up in a libearal environment, my parents never instilled any anti-muslim sentiments in my mind, whereas everywhere else I found that hindu children are told vicious things by parents about their muslim counterparts. Here I have tried to list down some of the misinformation fed to the children from a young age, which later perhaps shapes their perception of the community:
( based on my experience of growing up in small town north India)

• Muslims are the filthiest creatures to be found. They take bath only on friday, the day of prayer, and they make do with their customary 'wuzu' (ablutions) for rest of the days. And not to forget, they hardly ever change or wash their clothes.
• All muslims are incestuous. They don't value any sisterly or filial relationships and can be betrothed to even their step-mother.
  
• Muslims are very cruel, they have no feelings and in the event of slightest tiff, they will chop you like a butcher the moment they seize you . And muslim women are not far behind, they too can make a barrah kabab out of you single handedly with their knives in times of riots.
  
• They have no culture, tradition or customs. They will keep four wives and divorce their wife whenever they wish.
• Muslims can never be trusted, they would never fight shy of backstabbing at first available opportunity.

Now, these reasons are adequate enough to create a distorted picture in the impressionable young minds, but not enough to clamp down young childhood friendships. Inspite of all the misgivings parents or society tried to inculcate among my friends, none of them ever had any reservation in sharing our study notes or lunch boxes. I don't know how many of them feel the same way about muslims now, but I am very sure it must not be very different from what it used to be.

Eastern Uttar Pradesh, the place where I grew up, was once famous for it's ganga-jamuni tehzeeb, the camaraderie between different faiths and harmonious, peaceful co-existence.This, coupled with liberal attitude of my envioronment, led me to be enchanted by the wonderful cultural heritage I was exposed to. I looked forward to month of ramzaan much more than Holi or Deewali because unlike a single day of celebration, it brought steady stream of muslim delicacies in the form of iftaari for one whole month. Muhaaram was not far behind in my scheme of things, where I would listen to all the marsias and wait for the hissa, the food item given at the end of the majlis. I used to go to mosques and dargaahs with same reverence as to the temples every year before examination results were to be announced. ( Even today, I feel muslim dargah are quicker in listening to your wishes and granting them than hindu gods)

Cut to year 2006, while travelling through busy lanes of bangalore, my fairly liberal, educated, broadminded friend becomes wary of driving in a muslim ghetto. His fears are same. He feels he will be killed if he accidentally even just touches a kid running on the road. I prod him to know more about his paranoia and he gives me the same answers: how muslims are brute, and killing people is in their blood, they have no compunction while butchering people. When I remind him of the atrocities perpetrated by hindus in gujrat riots, he gets dismissive of it as a retaliatory action.

My arguments could not convince him on that day that there can be a non-violent muslim, and I had to give up. I normally don't try to act as an intellectual, liberal champion of muslim cause. But in his case, I was deeply hurt. I never expected somebody of his class, intelligence and awareness to be so rigid in his view of his muslims, and he never believed in right wing politics of BJP. I later realized that it was not his fault that he had not come across any muslim who challenged his set perception of muslims. Those beliefs were perpetuated in his mind by mass media where all terrorist activities are brandished as muslim handiwork.

As mentioned in the article by Mr. Ramchandra Guha, in whose response, the piece of Writing that I responded to was written; people who migrated from pakistan at the time of partition are most resentful of muslims. They see them as the reason they were displaced, and hold them responsible for everything they went through. Political parties have exploited this sentiment and used it to rouse people against each other. It has become another 'us' versus 'them'. When I look back, I find not 'them'. We were all 'us' and hope to continue to remain so.

In his particularly relavant book on this subject, Identity and Violence, Prof. Amartya Sen discusses the same nature of commonality which bonds people of different faiths. Dismemberment of Bangladesh is a case in point that religion alone cannot keep people united. I just wish more people become curious to find commonalities than differences among muslims of today's india and see that we are more similar to them than what is projected by political parties.

P.S. Some people might get confused as to how it is possible to be friends with muslims and all that ganga-jamuni tehzeeb remains intact, when such a malicious traits are attributed to muslim. The list of virtues ascribed to muslims are part of a folklore which gets passed down to different generation, and everyone renounces them when they see muslims are not what is projected of them, because they get chance to be frinds with them, study with them and interact with them, unlike living in a ghettoized envioronment

Who is the 'fairest' among all

Koffee with Karan is quite a popular show on Star World and the best part of the show is that you not only get A-line celebrities ( except for an episode featuring Ektaa Kapoor and her harem of Men from K-Serials. And before you scream- Rakhi Sawant, let me say, though she is not intellectual and all, she is a loved by masses who love her as much for her crassness as for her antics). The section which is most talked about in the show, or often more controversial than others is 'Rapid Fire' round, where the host asks the guest questions in rapid succession and expects some masaaledar fiery answers.

Now, one of the most frequent questions which is put across to the guests has been: " who is the best actress- Rani, Kajol or Aishwarya?". The answers have been varied and most guest choosing between Rani or Kajol, leaving Aish behind, and if I can make a rough approximations Rani would have got 40% compared to Kajol's 60%. A few weeks back, the show featured Javed Akhtar and Shabana Azami and they were asked the same question. I don't recall Javed Akhtar's response but Shabana was quite quick and convinced in her response when she chose an actress out of the troika. "Konkona Sen Sharma", said Shabana , in her characteristic equanimity, without batting an eyelid while answering the question. This answer really got me thinking. Who is the the best actress today in Indian Cinema, and fortunately I seem to be in agreement with Shabana here.

Konkana Sen Sharma won best actress national award for ' Mr & Ms Iyer' in 2002; and I, for yet not having seen the movie, felt that there again goes story of daughter of an established art house director, having considerable influence over the jury who got the best actress award favored to her daughter, much in the same way people accused Saif Ali Khan for having snatched Best actor for Hum Tum under the aegis of her mother Sharmila Tagore. In retrospect, I feel my reservation over Konkona had much more to do with my Indian sensibilities which smells a rat every time somebody with illustrious parents excels in the fields they choose, rather than some obscure underdog winning the coveted prize from hinterlands ( How many of us raised eyebrows when Meera Jasmine won in 2004).

I feel utterly humbled later on by her acting prowess when she slipped easily into varied characters one after another such as a tamilian Iyer housewife to mother of a young child inclined to 'swing' in 'Mixed Doubles' to that of a 30+ virgin in Life in a Metro..But for me, her most lovable performance was in 'Omkara' where she played a village belle to perfection. Though, each character stood out in that movie, however, she remains my personal favorite. Her diction, body language and expression transported me to western Uttar Pradesh. Now, there is a woman who is unfazed by the presence of bigger stars like kareena in Omkaara , Rani in Laaga Chunari Mein Daag ( where reports suggest that she is taking extra care in the presence of best actress of India currently to save her reputation of being queen bee of hindi films) or with Madhuri in Aaja nachle.
An overlooked perfomance of hers in Yun hota to kya hota directed by Naseerudin Shah, where he rightly acknowledged her to be THE BEST actress in India today, should also be mentioned to highlight her versatilty. Without doubt, she is not the best looking actress around, but having said that, her acting makes up for more than how she looks. And needless to add, I am a Big fan of hers!

Chak De!

I don't often watch hindi movies, but my bored life sometimes forces me to watch one, that too, all alone. Having said that, let me add, I like watching movies. Usually, the kind of movies I watch are not appreciated by people I have for company. So, I watch them all alone, without getting distracted by distraction of my fellow moviewatcher by the designer clothes or lack of them, or finding something funny in serious scenes. So, I went out and watched two movies this weekend in quick succession.

The first movie, Chak de India, was not a movie I would have gone on a normal day. Firstly, I am not too fond of Shahrukh Khan's acting abilities, and not at all fond of his looks ( He looks like a hanger in his new lean look, What's up with these oldies, I say? I just hope that he is not taking a leaf out of Shekhar Suman's book, where he, like Shahrukh, has gone popla without shedding his teeth). And let me also add a completely extraneous statement that I was not swayed by the fact it had 16 girls playing hockey players. ( Would have been different if it had 16 male hockey players like Vivan Bhatena, He was such a cute prick in the movie). It is often said that the best way to enjoy a movie is to go without any expectation and form your opinion only after you have seen the movie. This has been proved so true in this case that I had to swallow all my misgivings about this movie. The story line and everything was dissected, and was all over the news, therefore I had a fair idea what was in store. But surprised I was, when I saw the final product. Shahrukh khan for once was restrained and did not get to twist his lips, or shed copious tears while shaking his neck the way he does when he loses his heroine. All the girls were perfectly cast and showed decent acting abilities, while dribbling the hockey stick, which by no means would have been easy.

The best part of movie was its taut screenplay and editing, Shimit Amin himself being an ex-editor would have certainly helped here. Much to my chagrin, I enjoyed the movie so much so that I even fancied Sagarika Ghatge playing the role of Preeti Sabharwal. Kudos to Jaideep Sahni and Aditya Chopra for having conceived such a film and bringing it to us, without having to worry about commercial viabilty of a movie centering around women Hockey. Jaideep, who also helms the dialogue and lyrics of the movies has brought out the character sketches beautifully. All in all, though it may been inspired by hollywood movie Miracle, yet it has been indianised so well that it makes every indian shout Chak De..India!! at the end.

In Which I attend A dance school Part II

Well, the last post seemed more like-blowing my own trumpet kinda thing. But, Hey!! I do get such liberties on my blog. Though, the last post was about attending dance school, I had only described my visit to a school and dance was nowhere in picture. And, picture perfect it was: My dance instructor. Contrary to popular belief, when even my family thought I am going there for hook ups, I went to dance school purely to learn dance.

Having never moved a single muscle in my entire life, except those which are used for eating and sleeping, I was/am a pathetic dancer. Not taking things as they are is an old habit of mine, and I sought to change this by joining the dance academy. While I was keen on some Social Dancing ( according to their definition all form of dances where you have a partner are social dances: as if being single & gay is crime and unsocial), they refused to take me for lack of a partner. Hmm, I was on my dance instructor ( not literally). So, he cajoled me to join the so called Jazz dance classes ( not that he had to try much :)), and asked me to come at appointed hour. He looked quite promising while shaking his legs, and I happily signed wishing one day I will be making the same moves . The moment he saw me again next day, wearing a body clinging vest and very very tight lowers, he Flashed a big smile. And, there is was. An athletic lithe body with sweat beading drops all over his forehead, his sinuous hands curving like one of those undulated bolsters which had been subjected with a corpulent body. He welcomed us all and flashed a big smile. And for the first time, I saw it clearly: what I had been missing all along. He had the ugliest, the palest- or shall I call them brown- teeth in the universe. How could people take such simple things for granted, could he have not used a better toothbrush. Or what's these days wrong with our Babool, Close up, Colgate and Pepsodent. Why god has to make every nice looking bloke with a flaw that cannot be condoned.

Anyways, I even shudder to think how his breath will smell. Now, I am always keeping a safe distance and doing my routine correctly-as much as possible- so that he never comes to correct my position and I have to beat that sight again. Up, close, and not so personal!!

In which I attend a Dance School

I hate it when I come to blog after a long time, and have a thousand things to say. In this flurry of outpouring all my thoughts at once, I usually get lost in my own web of words. While trying to keep it single & straight ( quite unlike me), why don't i give you an account of past week, though it was nothing but momentous.

After months of deliberations, where I was lost between the choice of learning a new language or a dance form, I opted for Learning dance. The choice was abetted by the fact of proximity of dance school to my place. So, when I decided to pay a visit to this famous dance school/ workshop, I had little idea that they conduct these classes in normal schools. In order to enroll myself, I visited these schools ( two of them ), and it was a very strange feeling. Stepping on to a world that I had left long back, when all memories of school were effectively erased from my overburdened mind, made me realize the increased emphasis parents put these days on good education. Having studied in government schools with almost no infrastructure and poor teaching, not to mention complete lack of extra curricular activities-though not much relevant, I saw my first library when I had finished my college-I was amazed to see the opportunities presented before a upper middle class kid. The school I went had AC classroom, wonderful computer labs, playground with assorted toys and other aids, and my favorite- the craft room ( though I suspect most of the craft projects were made by parents for their children). I used to be very bitter about having lost on going to 'elite' institutions, and often imagined how much more I could have achieved if I had got there. In retrospect, I feel the angst was misplaced. I still believe if one is good and passionate about something, nothing will come in one's way to achieve what one is capable of. I would have been more confident and more aware of my capabilities, had I joined such places. Nevertheless, exploring one's true potential without the help and support of a mentor or guide, makes one more confident than in the former case, where not only you realize your potential but also take pride in the fact that you have reached wherever you have, on your merit and perseverance. And trust me on this, it feels great to be in command of your destiny!